Lost child

Moving is a very stressful business. It is always found among the top three most stressful activities in our lives because of its overall impact and needs to be handled with care. When moving house, the family can be prepared for this major upheaval by using what I call my PEP strategy and encourager, which relates to the Practical, Emotional and Positive elements of the whole transitional process.

The practical part of moving is very important for the family, especially in the last three months before the move. Getting it right through checking and double checking related tasks that have to be completed beforehand will lessen the confusion at the destination end reduce the stress of moving on everyone involved. Once a decision has been made to move, contacting relevant organisations from a prepared list (llke utility providers, doctors, dentists, insurers etc.) is essential for the smooth transfer and continuation of all services. Best thing when moving is for everyone in the family, no matter the age, to be assigned specific tasks which gives them responsibility for overseeing the smooth transition of certain items and duties, even if it involves only their bedroom or toys. A good task is usually labelling which carries a fair degree of responsibility, while at the same time leaving much room to be creative in actually making up the labels and ways of checking that everything is covered. This action also gives ownership too, reinforcing family members as valuable parts of the team.

Other very useful preparation includes getting rid of clutter to reduce the items that will e carried, while at the same time doing one's bit for charity by donating unwanted items. To help on the other end, the family can use a priority labeling system which ensures that all key items have a special sign and the next items in priority order are clearly marked too. Not too much time will then be spent searching for much needed items. Pack things on a room by room basis and devise a plan for unpacking at the other home that offers as little confusion as possible. Of course, nearer the date, the removal men will need top be booked and, a few days before moving, 'survival' kits (useful items including toothbrushes, soaps, towel etc.) will be needed for all family members for the first couple of days in the new home.

Lots of Fear


Emotionally, moving is extremely stressful for the family. They would be leaving the home they have occupied for some time as well as the friends they have built up, the work colleagues they have come to know and trust. There will be lots of fear and apprehension at the move, even though the new home might be most welcome. This is where much encouragement will be needed - particularly for the youngsters - to look to the future and what is possible than to dwell on what is passing. Family members would need to be encouraged to see the potential of the new home, the neighbourhood, education and work, to keep focused on the quality of life that is now possible from a new environment. Often this emotional part is ignored through the focus on the practical bits, but getting this right will help enormously in ensuring the practical tasks are accomplished because people who feel good about moving will make more of a success of it. This means an emphasis on positivity and self belief.

The more positive a family is about the move the more successful it is likely to be and the more they will see the benefits for themself without any imposition. Young children, in particular, need reassurance of being able to make new friends easily, to feel wanted and welcomed and to feel that moving is a good thing for them, not just for the parents. They are likely to be more positive about the process if they are made to feel a significant part of it, to be useful rather than shunted aside. With this simple PEP strategy, nothing is left out in the triangle of preparation when a family is moving. Everyone is likely to cope much better and to feel more welcoming of this massive change in their life.